Are you sometimes afraid of being yourself?
One of the main reasons people have trouble being themselves is the fear of how others will react. The fact is, being yourself will sometimes rub people the wrong way. This is something you will have to accept or else it can make you feel miserable or even have you begin doubting yourself.
I know that it can be difficult when people attack or criticize you just for being yourself and although you may want to react, this will only drain your own energy and steal precious time from your life. Sometimes understanding why the other person is behaving that way helps you to ignore them and move on.
The reasons they behave the way they do does not mean they are right or justified in their actions, but understanding where they are coming from can help you to quickly assess their behavior and allow you to move on.
Here are 6 reasons why people may react to you just for being yourself:
1. They are jealous of you. They wish they could be free to be themselves and seeing you live your life with freedom reminds them of their self-imposed slavery. This behavior can be conscious or unconscious. They may be jealous of your success, your freedom, or just the fact that you are comfortable in your own skin. Most often they have a victim mentality and you are showing them that it can be done which puts an end to their excuses. This obviously does not sit well with them.
2. They have unsuccessfully tried to emulate you. When you are yourself, you create a desire in others to have that same sense of joy and freedom. Someone else may suddenly begin copying your work, your ideas, or even the way you dress. What happens is it doesn’t work for them, which of course it never would because they have their own life path. They don’t have the insight to comprehend this and then become angry or resentful at you because they can’t understand why copying your life or business didn’t work for them. They see it as being unfair rather than not being true to themselves.
3. They have strongly ingrained beliefs. These are deeply rooted, strongly fixed beliefs that cause them to severely judge other people. Often they are not fully aware of these ingrained beliefs. They may have come from their religion, family, culture, or schooling. An example of a strongly ingrained belief is that there is only one right religion and everyone else who does not practice their religion is evil or wrong. Sometimes it is taken even farther in that you may be the same religion as this other person but they feel the only right way to worship is “their way.” They have a lack of tolerance or respect for other people’s beliefs. Another common deeply rooted belief is that spiritual people should not be successful. People may love you if you are poor and think the work you are doing is wonderful…… that is until you begin making a decent living.
4. They hate themselves. This is a very sad but true fact. When people hate themselves, they lash out at other people and especially people who are happy and abundant in all areas of their life. They may have come from a difficult family situation or were put down consistently by others. When they have a lack of love for themselves it makes it very hard for them to love others. They were never allowed to be themselves or loved for being themselves.
5. They are unhappy with their life choices and feel stuck. No, it’s not your fault who they chose to marry, where they chose to live, or what business they went into. What has happened is that you are a constant reminder of their unhappiness. Your freedom and joy only magnifies what they are trying so hard to deny. You are unintentionally forcing them to look at their lives.
6. They are Energy Vampires. These are people who feed off of the energy of others, most often they aren’t even aware of what they are doing. They start arguments for no reason at all, attack, criticize, and create drama. This is a habit, much as a drug addict needing a fix. When everything is calm and you are feeling love and happiness they come in like a high powered vacuum sucking up all of your energy. When they leave you feel like you have been hit by truck and don’t know why, while they on the other hand feel much better and have stopped “the shakes” by sucking up your energy. When you are being yourself you have good energy and they want it, so this makes you a much better target than another energy vampire who doesn’t have as much “juice.” Once you are aware of this you can protect yourself.
My purpose for explaining where the other person is coming from is not for you to try to change, fix, judge, or criticize them. It’s so that you understand that it’s not about you at all. When you come from a place of understanding and compassion it keeps you from being sucked into their world.
Continue being yourself and following your own path and as you do you will inspire those who choose to let go of their fear to also be themselves.
If you would like to schedule a 30 minute complimentary Life Coaching consultation with me to learn more about my Life Coaching services please contact me at info@TonyaSheridan.com
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